Anthony de Mello in “Awareness”
Tag Archives: Effort
“If I were aware of what the snake was, I wouldn’t brush it off my arm; it would get brushed off through me. – That’s the change I am talking about. You don’t change yourself; it’s not me changing me. Change takes place through you, in you. – You see change take place in you, through you, in your awareness, it happens. You don’t do it.”
16 Nov“What does self change entail? – First, insight. Not effort, not cultivating habits, not having an ideal. There’s another great task, understanding.”
16 NovAnthony de Mello in “Awareness”
“The more you resist something, the greater power you give to it. – You always empower the demons you fight. – But if you flow with the enemy, you overcome the enemy. How does one cope with evil? Not by fighting it, but by understanding it. In understanding, it disappears.”
16 NovAnthony de Mello in “Awareness”
“Get rid of your fear of failure, your tensions about succeeding, you will be yourself. Relaxed. You wouldn’t be driving with your brakes on. That’s what would happen.”
11 NovAnthony de Mello in “Awareness”
More in a fable on P.58 “There’s a lovely saying of Tranxu, a great Chinese sage, that I took the trouble to learn by heart. It goes: ‘When the archer shoots for no particular prize, he has all his skills; when he shoots to win a brass buckle, he is already nervous; when he shoots for a gold prize, he goes blind, sees two targets and is out of his mind. His skill has not changed, but the prize divides him. He cares! He things more of winning than of shooting, and the need to win drains him of power.”
“Perfect love casts out fear. Where there is love there are no demands, no expectations, no dependency. I do not demand that you make me happy; my happiness does not lie in you. If you were to leave me, I will not feel sorry for myself; I enjoy your company immensely, but I do not cling. I enjoy it on a nonclinging basis. What I really enjoy is not you; it’s something that’s greater than both you and me. It’s something that I discovered, a kind of symphony, a kind of orchestra that plays one melody in your presence, but when you depart, the orchestra doesn’t stop. When I meet someone else, it plays another melody, which is also very delightul. And when I am alone, it continues to play. There’s a great repertoire and it never ceases to play. That’s what awakening is all about.”
11 NovAnthony de Mello in “Awareness”
“When I say disciplined, I’m not talking about effort. – Look at the river as it moves to the sea. It creates its own banks that contain it. When there’s something within you that moves in the right direction, it creates its own discipline.”
11 NovAnthony de Mello in “Awareness”
“Do you want to change the world? How about beginning with yourself?”
2 Nov– Anthony de Mello in “Awareness”
“The trouble with people is that they are busy fixing things they don’t even understand. We’re always fixing things, aren’t we? It never strikes us that things don’t need to be fixed. They really don’t. This is a great illumination. They need to be understood. If you understood them, they’d change.”
1 Nov– Anthony de Mello in “Awareness”
“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.”
3 OctQuote by Anais Nin, emailed from Melissa, to me Audrey and Megan.
Week 3 Recap // Guilt, Laziness vs Doing Not-Doing
1 JulIn general, last week I felt very unproductive, and I felt like I dropped the ball on most of things I wanted to accomplish. There is a general feeling of laziness, which I keep saying (after reading Tao Te Ching), “I am in the Tao. I am doing not-doing”. There are times when that feels really real, and everything happens through me (not forced), but there are other times, where I feel like I am just lazy. Albeit, I do feel motivated today to pick up where I left off, so that is always a sign that things are happening, and that even phases of laziness change. On the positive side, I am loving my home. I re-arranged some things and finally feel like we have the furniture set up correct. It’s been 4mo, and we finally nailed it.
- WEEKENDS: Weekends are still difficult for me to gather and input data into My Daily Chart.
- SLEEP: I still think I am getting less sleep than I normally would need. I am taking Melatonin to fall asleep most nights.
- SUPPLEMENTS: I slacked a bit this past week, but am hoping to up it this week.
- TEMPERATURE: I lost my thermometer and am kind of okay with that.
- HYDRATION: So here is where I am really proud. Because I was having a difficult time keeping track, I started drinking out of my favorite mason jar. I put a clear piece of tape over the jar and I mark with a permanent marker the amount of times I drink the full glass. I typically pour 10-12oz. This has worked really well for me. Also, I am getting in the habit of drinking my 8-12oz right when I wake up, so I feel less inclined to continue to track that.
- DREAMING: I’d still like to start tracking my dreams as well.
- SOCIAL: This week I have been feeling less social. Particularly, I was out of contact with my family and inlaws, when I knew I should have been calling them. I also slacked on my email. One thing I did not really realize is that my two best friends are out of town, and my third bestie and neighbor is also out of town. Socially, my go-to’s are gone, and I have a hard time staying in touch with people when the structure and systems change.
- BODY IMAGE: I still feel like my butt is turning into a “mom’s butt”. I am kicking back into gear with butt and ab exercises, and I am going to track that. I wonder how much I will need to increase my cardio? I also purchased a gym membership, which I will enact sometime in the next few weeks (but am in no rush).
- SKIN: My skin was overall pretty great this week. I have some shoulder bumps, but not anything noticeable.
- HEALTH: I felt groggy in the mornings, no matter how much sleep I got. I did Netti Pot this morning and yesterday morning on the tale of a “party weekend”, so I felt really good about doing that. I think it has helped.
- DISPOSITION: Adding this category this week. I would say I felt restless and unmotivated at the same time. There is a general feeling that I am waiting for something to happen, or that I am being lazy.
- HOUSE: Last week things started to lose their domestic charm. This week, I feel great. I re-arranged the furniture and the place feels like HOME. I am also going through a desire for minimalism, but we’ll see how that goes. Overall, I am loving my place. My husband and I also went to Home Depot and picked up some things. I am in the process of building a modern gazeebo in my back patio. Really excited about that.
- CAR: Like last week, nothing has happened. Except, I received a parking ticket and now there is a sign on my car that it is the property of LA because I have yet to register it in Cali. Urgh.
- MORE ON THE TAO: I am still toying with “doing not-doing”, but it is challenging. And I feel hopeful (i.e. I am desiring), that I feel more motivated.
- OTHER: Still watching My So Called Life and loving it. I am out of insecurity and more into a bit of guilt and “hard on myself” tactics. I am craving isolation. It is hard to do that in a marriage and when living with someone. It is so internal.
- PERSONAL: Maybe I will write about people in code, so I can increase the honesty in all of my texts and experiences.
- PRODUCTIVITY: Also adding this category, mainly because it has been central to my experience this past week. In many ways, I have been highly productive. I bought URL’s, re-arranged my house, hung shelves, started my gazeebo, built a website, went to the flea market, had quality time with friends, organized a dinner party… but still, because I had this month planned on doing more PhMe research and I set the standard for myself that I am a great friend, I feel guilty that I have not dedicated time to those projects/relationships. I’d like to reserve my Sundays to call friends and am putting it on my calendar to do so for this coming week.
Ph"ME" 